Casual sex or a committed relationship? Some people believe casual sex hook ups are easy and have no complications, but sex is loaded with emotions and often you can receive mixed messages, especially after having sex that leaves you excited for days. This can be a problem if one partner is not interested in romance or commitment.
It’s really important to set some rules before starting a casual relationship to avoid disappointment, heartache or feeling exploited. Another important issue is alcohol — often people regret or feel guilty about a sexual encounter after drinking too much — or not using a condom. Opponents of casual sex say it’s reckless in spreading STIs.
Nowadays, with the rise of smartphones around the world, mobile dating apps have sprung up, using GPS technology to match singles with others who are close by. The most popular one launched in late 2012 — Tinder, which soon became the favourite hook-up app for the 18-35-year-olds. The app’s popularity lies in the fact that you can look for a date, a short-term relationship, a friend with benefits or a more serious relationship instantly. Tinder’s technology allows people to browse profile photos of other users within a set geographical distance. It also links to Facebook, which shows a lot more information. In some ways it can be safer than picking up someone you’ve never met before in the pub, and taking him or her home.
What are the differences between casual sex and a one-on-one relationship?
A primary difference between casual dating and a serious relationship is that people who are dating casually are not necessarily monogamous. With casual dating a commitment is not required, and therefore those involved in this type of relationship are normally free to see other people at the same time. People involved in a serious relationship should be monogamous and therefore both commit to only being involved with the other person.
Monogamous people tend to be very involved with each other and they see and talk to each other often. People in serious relationships also often move in with each other or spend the night together often. Surveys also show that overall they have significantly more sex than those who only date casually.
For people involved in casual dating, the level of seriousness is much lower. The two people do not feel the need to tell each other everything and may not even talk that often. Casual dating varies between couples. Some couples who are dating casually may see each other every day, while others may go for a while without seeing each other or talking. Others may only want one-night stands.
A lot of people who engage in casual dating do so for the fun and excitement of it. It allows them to have people to hang out with and go places with, without requiring a commitment to the person. It lets people be friends without anything more. But being in a serious relationship is not without fun for couples. They can find activities that they enjoy doing together and offers each person someone to socialize with and rely upon.
We shouldn’t overly romanticize sexual intimacy in long-term monogamous relationships nor should we devalue it. We should appreciate its pros and cons. Similarly, we shouldn’t romanticize the pleasures of casual sex and sexual variety either but appreciate its pros and cons. Truth is, all sex has some tendency to not live up to its advance billing.